Thursday, January 24, 2013

guilty

We found out that we could possibly be having a boy not too long ago. The ultrasound picture sure looks like a boy to me, but the ultrasound tech told us that it could be swollen girl parts and nothing was for sure. Well, I'm not going to lie. I kind of have my hopes up and love the idea of adding a mini Danny to our little family.

Is it normal to feel awful for feeling this way? Guilty even?

Here is a peak at the gender shot that we got at 15.5 weeks.
Those are the two legs on each side and little baby bits in between.

Now, I would be 100% thrilled if we are having a girl also. But Pais is my girl. Another confession: I have also said that, "it better be a boy," on several occasions. And I feel even more terrible for saying that out loud. Before I knew the possible gender I truly didn't care. I did not have one preference over the other, although I really wanted a boy for Danny's sake. But healthy is my main concern and still is, of course.

I just feel so terrible for wanting a boy so bad. A sister for Paisley would be so amazing and I would love another little girl more than anything. But a little balance in the house would be nice, don't you think?

We have our anatomy scan on February 8th. Two weeks from tomorrow when I will be 19 weeks (eek!. Whatever the outcome, I will be so happy! Maybe I should just stop calling the baby by his name and go back to referring to him as it.

1 comment:

  1. I totally feel you! Before we had our ultrasound, daddy J and I were so certain we're having a girl. When we found out it was a boy, I was a bit sad, to be honest. Not cause I wasn't grateful nor did I not like having a boy, it's just that we thought it was a girl all along and I already got so many girl stuff (hihi, compulsive buying!). Now, I can't imagine not having a little boy. It's so much fun with my little man and he is more than we could ever wish for!

    P.S
    I answered your question re: pumping. Feel free to ask away! :)

    Happy Mommy Adventures

    ReplyDelete